I know I bought you in order to use you strictly for labelling CD's, lunch-boxes, hats, drink-bottles and other items that get easily lost by distracted children.
I know I swore to you (never at you) that I would not use you for my art doodles.
The problem is, Sharpie dearest, that you are just too darn enticing. Is it because you are permanent, and I like the dangerous risk of never again being able to remove your marks from any surface you touch? Or is it your smooth, fine black line that you let me draw with such ease? I'm not sure. All I know is the opportunity to permanently draw all over my latest sunflower watercolour was more than my self-control could handle.
I promise, Sharpie, that I only intended to draw one or two little highlights in order to add depth and then I was going to put you away. But then, somehow, instead of stopping at those two highlights, I swear you made me keep outlining, dotting and dashing, until before I knew it, the entire sunflower had been completely covered by your black ink.
So you see, Sharpie, it really isn't my fault.
I really feel like it was you who made me do it.
Actually, when I think about it, Sharpie, I think really, it's you who should be apologising to me.
You know I'm right.
Sharpie, in advance, I just want you to know that I accept your apology and yes, I'd be delighted to use you again sometime.